Among other things, I write dark romance novels which range from steamy to graphic. Sometimes it’s a tough job.

No, really…

 

My husband is a HUGE Tennessee Vols fan (college football team) and frequents a Vols fan board. Our computers are on a U-shaped desk running around three walls of a room, so we’re constantly surfing and talking. The other night he was on the Vols board, where one of the ladies posted pictures of half-dressed male models.

 

Tom:  Look, honey. You could use these in your stories.

Erica:  Um… they don’t really do that much for me.

T:  None of them?

E:  Nuh-uh. Well, if I had to pick, this one’s OK.  (picture on Vols board of random guy in white swim trunks and sunglasses)

T:  Yeah, if I had to pick one of them to look like, that would be the one.

E:  He’s the most normal looking of the bunch to me, not too muscular, just balanced. He’s got a handsome face, too. He’d look good in a suit…or a polo or jeans and a t-shirt.

T:  (silence…silence…silence)

E:  Yeah, he’s real good-looking. I could use him.

T:  Looks like he’s got a small thing. Bet he doesn’t like women. He’s probably gay.

E:  TOM!

T:  (mutters) Well, he probably is…

E:  Besides, I’ve already got a whole folder of guys that I’m using for character models. Just look.  (Erica opens folder on computer and Tom’s mouth drops open.)  See, take this one for instance…

T:  ERICA, THOSE MEN ARE NAKED. YOU’VE GOT PORN ON YOUR MACHINE!!!

E:  Do not. I use them to work with. It’s art.

T:  It’s porn.

E:  Not.

T:  He’s huge.  (pauses thoughtfully)  Well, he might have a six-pack, but I’ve got a keg.

E:  (burst of laughter)  You do not.

T:  I could probably kick his butt. You think so?

E:  (still laughing)  Sure, honey.

T:  I fight dirty. I bite.

E:  Yeah, well lucky for him I’m using someone else in the piece I’m doing now.  (goes to another picture)

T:  Another big one. More porn. You’ve got all porn.

E:  Not.

T:  So, if that’s not porn, you’re telling me that I can save pictures of naked women on my computer?

E:  As long as you’re using it for work.

T:  Only work?

E:  Yeah, work.

T:  Damn.  (closes eyes and shakes head)

E:  Some of the guys in my pictures have clothes on. See, look at this one. Suz sent it to me. It’s Rob Rose. He’s a cover model, and he keeps his clothes on.

T:  Now, I can see why women would think he’s good-looking.

E:  Yeah, he’s nice looking, but not attractive to me.

T:  S-u-r-e.

E:  He’s not! He’s too classical. Too unapproachable to me. Suz loves him though.

T:  If I could look like another guy, I’d look like him. He’s got a nice body. His boobs are bigger than most women’s —

E:  TOM!!!

T:  (mutters again)  Well, they are…

E:  Anyway, I think this guy’s really attractive.  (goes to another picture)

T:  Another one with long hair. You must like guys with long hair. My hair’s short.

E:  I like short hair. The one I just showed you  has short hair — the one that’s in the piece I’m working on.

T:  Doesn’t matter. They’re all gay.

E:  They are not!

T:  And I can kick their butts.

 

 

You can help us settle this by voting. (Select more than one, if you like.)

Vote:

1. Research is vital for novelists. This means keeping current in subject matter.

2. The pics aren’t porn. They’re art.

3. Tom needs to get over it. I mean, it’s not like these guys are my desktop wallpaper or that I spend HOURS studying the files every day.

4. All the above.

 

Thanks!

 

Thanks for the pic, Pixomar

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7 Responses to RESEARCH – The Steamy Romance Novel

  1. Obviously the answer is #4. I loved the banter between you and your husband. Made my morning.

  2. corajramos says:

    #1 – Yes
    #2 – True
    #3 – True (tee hee)
    #4 – True and Yes (and love the banter)

  3. Erica Miles says:

    This is great! Another #4 vote. Thank, you, thank you, thank you!

  4. […] NAKED: Writer Erica Miles shows her husband her file of naked men. Research, she claims. […]

  5. Laird Sapir says:

    lol. This is awesome, and my vote is, obviously, ALL OF THE ABOVE! Get with it, Tom. It’s RESEARCH!!! 🙂

  6. […] I loved this. It made me laugh out loud. It’s Erica Miles‘ conversation with her husband about the lengths she goes to in researching a steamy romance […]